I warned you yesterday that today’s blog would be worthless, but here we all are. Lucky for you, you’re not actually ‘here’ as I’m sitting in Luton Airport’s departure lounge, a place that happily dances across the boundaries of being the skankiest rip off agents in the airport world and being ambassadors of the future. Case in point: I spent 10 minutes looking for a clear plastic bag to put my ‘liquids’ in before going through security. I’ve done this many times before and I am, if I may say so myself, a dab hand at putting things in bags. But today, unable to find a bag on the way into security I panicked and asked an angry looking red haired security lady where the see through recipients of my ‘possible threat’ toothpaste were, and she grunted and pointed me towards a machine where for £1 I could buy 4 contained within a kinder egg shell opened only with extreme violence. £1??? For some bloody fancy CIA sandwich bags? Has there been some study that proves real terrorists don’t carry small change? Or are they hoping that buy ripping people off at every angle they just won’t bother with the hassle?
Just as I was considering writing a letter on a website I took myself to Pret A Manger and I was able to pay for a sandwich by waving my card at a thing. I don’t know it’s official name, but thing seems right as it was proper futurey. I waved, it beeped, sandwich paid for. Immediately all bag payment issues were gone. Thank you The Future for such joy. Damn you Luton for knowing how to appease my anger.
I should be in Glasgow by 10ish, and will land 10 mins after Pete Firman. He has declared via Twitter that we are having an ‘Air Race’. I think he has only said this because he has a headstart and will definitely win. Being a sucker, I’ve accepted the challenge. I hope he gets horribly delayed in the name of sport. Knowing him, he’ll use magic to slow time or something. I bet he magicjed some free plastic bags from his sleeve too. Security didn’t think about that did they? I’m going to suggest all wizards are declared at customs.
Full Glasgow report tomorrow in my much awaited blogsplosion!
