Lansley, Tosser

I was going to try my best today to write about something other than Andrew Lansley and the NHS but its very difficult. I hate very much that such a loathsome man has taken over not only this week’s blogs but generally much of my thinking for the past week. It’s reached such an extent that last night I was seconds away from turning off Toy Story 3 (an amazing film. Except for the bit where they meet the Sex Toys) ten minutes before the end – you know, when it gets actually properly heart renting and sad? – just to watch that evil man, who’s hair looks like its been superimposed onto his head, squirm around trying to defend his frankly destructive bill. I didn’t stop the film you’ll be glad to hear, and Nat, L and I were all subject to a soaked face replete with pangs for our childhood playthings.

Question Time was amazing though. The audience were so very passionate about the NHS, Phil Hammond was brilliantly brutal at dealing with Lansley and Ken made me wonder how we ever let Boris become London mayor. All the while Mark Littlewood said obnoxious things whilst looking like Hitler and Sarah Sands showed why the Evening Standard is a shit paper. Most importantly, I enjoyed watching Lansley not make eye contact with anyone who asked him questions about the reform. I really enjoyed him making statements that made little sense – telling Phil Hammond, a doctor, that he’s not trusting doctors. Brilliant – followed by him stating that the UK is a great place to work. How dare he promote employment here in a country that has currently got the highest unemployment rate in 17 years? Has he no grounding in reality?

Judging by his plans to curb British obesity that were revealed yesterday, no. The strategy apparently is to ‘eat less, exercise more’. Well done Columbo. Any other horribly obvious plans you want to tell us? Why not tell us that the best way to stop fires is to ‘not set fire to things’ or have we tried ‘sleeping’ to stop tiredness?’ Eating less and exercising more is the best way to stop obesity, granted, but surely more effort should be placed in educating children how best to have a balanced diet and perhaps tackle those big companies that plough fat into their food? Sure Lansley claims they are aiming to reduce calories in their products but that’s not what will help. We need to stop the amount of processed foods available full stop. People need to know what else there is available. But will a Health Secretary who had help writing his health legislation from representatives from McDonalds, Unilever, Walkers and Pepsi do such a thing? No. Because much like with the NHS, he prefers the big companies filling his wallet at the expense of the public.

ANDREW LANSLEY BANKROLLED BY PRIVATE SECTOR

MCDONALDS AND PEPSICO TO HELP WRITE HEALTH LEGISLATION

Even Jamie Oliver has dismissed yesterday’s obesity plans by saying that there are ‘eight-year-olds with more creative solutions to these problems.’ And that’s a man who ensured I never watch him on television again after he used the term ‘easy cheesy.’ I’m just saying. Ultimately its very clear that Andrew Lansley is a man who has very little idea or infact care of what the people of Britain need or want. The NHS bill not only needs to be stopped, but it needs to be stopped in a way that means Lansley has to step down and we get someone who perhaps cares about people’s health not the healthy state of their own bank account.