Last night in my dream I had to eat popcorn that never seemed to end and all the while I did it, a man in a Hawaiian shirt kept humming the calypso theme. Then there was a bit where somebody kept running up behind me, stroking my arms and running away and the only other […]
TENT-TATIVE I’ve just bought a tent. I’ve never bought a tent before. I’ve borrowed tents, often to return them in a state of muddied ruin, with tent pegs bent all out of shape and the whole package shoved back into its tiny bag with seemingly high disregard so that it looks to be experiencing a […]
I’ll be honest. I’m still a bit drunk. This blog could go all over the shop if its any indication of how I feel. I feel all over the shop. If I was in a shop right now, I would be all over it like a rash. Big department stores would be a challenge but […]
FLYING ANTS Yesterday was supposedly that day where all the flying ants appear. I should probably research it and find out why that it, but I like to think shedloads of ants wake up with wings, get all happy and over excited and race around like the red antrrows (see what I did?) then wake […]
This is a mini blog. Hence the name blig. Things become instantly smaller sounding if you replace their vowels for ‘i’s. There used to be a barmaid at the Sir Thomas A Becket pub in Canterbury who looked exactly like Anna Kornikova if she was a bit squished. Therefore we renamed the barmaid Ini Kinikivi. […]
There were a lot of elements of yesterday that should have deemed it a bad day. The sort of bad day where without self restrain I could have happily run around causing minor nuisance by kicking over bins and pushing over pedestrians. That level of rage where if you were to contain your fury there […]
On yesterday’s journey to and back from a gig that did not turn out as expected, Paul Byrne brought the best journey chat I’d been company to in some time. Journey chat is very important as it a) keeps me awake and stops me from crashing and b) stops me sitting in awkward silence as […]
I have a tickly cough. It is the worst sort of cough as its name suggests it might at the very least make you laugh. It doesn’t. It instead that other type of tickling. That type that’s done by someone who deems it appropriate to invade your personal space and try to tickle you despite […]
I’ve done a lot of walking today. There is a chance that had I walked anymore that I’d have had to buy the rights off of the Proclaimers to their most famous hit, and sing it proudly as I marched back from Holloway. It would have involve some odd stares and possibly violence directed towards […]
If I was an animal today, I’d be a busy bee. Not my ideal choice. Yellow and black is not this season. Having six limbs would make buying jumpers or trousers pretty hard – depending on which category you classed your extra two appendages as. Personally I’d have one extra of each. Therefore I could […]